Many people in my life know that my current pregnancy is in fact my second pregnancy.
My first pregnancy did not go full-term. I developed preeclampsia at 20 ish weeks and had to deliver the baby.
Some people think I had a mis carriage, sometimes I don’t correct them on it because, whatever. To learn more about what preeclampsia is, go here.
I am writing this post because 1) I feel pretty discouraged 2) I could use some prayers and 3) I don’t want an early baby to be a surprise to the whole world (if it happens)
What is going on
Last Wednesday I went in for a routine visit with my perinatologist, Dr. Schemmer (its pronounced Shimmer, awesome name right?). He was the same doctor who visited with me before I was induced with my first pregnancy.
After getting the normal blood pressure check, the nurse looked at me alarmed. She said “Lets take that again in a few minutes, just breathe deep and try to relax.”
Ok, can do. She took it again.
“Its supposed to go down, not up!”
Grrrreeat. Labs were ordered. I was asked to track my blood pressure.
And whether it was the stress of knowing my BP was high, or who knows what, we decided to go to the hospital that night to be safe. My BP got up to 150/100. The nurse spoke with my OB, Dr. Savage, and told me that I was on modified bed rest. She also couldn’t let me go until we had a good 20 minute reading of my baby’s heart rate. She wouldn’t stop moving, glad to know she was doing fine.
Thursday was spent laying on my couch, watching Project Runway and crocheting. Oh, and running all the scenarios in my head. What if I get put on bed rest? What if I have to drop my classes? What if I have to deliver the baby?
Friday I visited Dr. Savage. All my labs looked normal, and my blood pressure was down. But, if she had to bet on it, she said I am likely developing preeclampsia again.
Where I’m at now
I’m okay with the reality of having to deliver early. We are almost seven weeks farther along than I was with my first pregnancy. It doesn’t mean all will go well, if I do indeed develop it. I am just preparing for that reality. I’m still hoping that she can stay full term.
But that might not happen. It is not all in my head when I can definitely feel the difference in my body the past week. Shortness of breathe and heavy chest. If I wasn’t already missing energy from having a normal pregnancy, I’m definitely feeling the affects of high blood pressure.
And now I sit 3 hours before the add/drop deadline for school and wonder if I should be in school this semester or not. I feel so discouraged today. I know this is not my fault. Preeclampsia is such an unknown thing, especially in my case. (Well except now I can add to my health history that I have indeed developed preeclampsia, which could cause me to get it again. And that appears to be a very real possibility right now)
And it is so unpredictable. My labs were normal last week (which is so so good) but I could be delivering this little baby the next week. It onsets so quickly.
I wish I knew what to do. And I have to decide in the next three hours.
P.S. The baby is doing fine. She kicks and punches me all day long. Keep kicking little girl, I’d like you to fit in this when you are born.